Read the text and and find out the reasons of divorce.

For many people the divorce of their parents marks a turning point in their lives, whether the divorce happened many years ago or is taking place right now. About half the marriages in the United States today end in divorce, so children of divorce are certainly not alone. It may seem hard, but it is possible to cope with divorce – and have a happy family life in spite of some changes divorce may bring. After all, couples divorce one another, not their kids.

There are many reasons why parents divorce. They may include serious problems like alcoholism or abuse, but often couples divorce because they can no longer live together in harmony. One parent may have changed in some ways, and the other could not adapt. Some couples may have simply drifted apart over time. Others find that they no longer love each other as they once did.

It’s common for teens to think that their parents’ divorce is somehow their fault, but nothing could be further from the truth. Some teens may wonder if they could have helped to prevent the split. Others may wish they had prevented arguments by cooperating more within the family. But separation and divorce are a result of a couple’s problems with each other, not with their kids. The decisions adults make about divorce are their own.

If your parents are divorcing, you may experience a variety of feelings, and your emotions may change frequently, too. You may feel angry, upset, or sad. You might feel protective of one parent or blame one for the situation. You may feel abandoned, afraid, worried, or guilty. You may also feel relieved. These feelings are normal and talking about them with a trusted friend or adult can help.

There’s no doubt that your parents’ divorce will affect your daily life. Depending on your particular situation, you may have to adjust to many changes. These could include things like movingand changing schools, spending time with both parents separately, and dealing with some parents’ unpleasant feelings toward one another.

Issues of money may change for your parents, too. A parent who didn’t work during the marriage may need to find a job to pay for rent or a mortgage. There are expenses associated with divorce, from lawyers’ fees to the cost of moving to a new place to live. Your family may not be able to afford all the things you were used to before the divorce.

Some teens have to travel between parents, and that may pose problems both socially and practically. There may be some hassles, but with time you can create a new routine that works.

Your parents may go to court to determine custody arrangements. You may end up living with one parent most of the time and visiting the other, or your parents may split their time with you evenly. Often, it takes a while for custody arrangements to be finalized. This can give people time to adapt to these big changes and for families to figure out together what works best.

What parents and teens can do to make divorce easier:

Keep the peace. Dealing with divorce is easiest when parents get along. Teens find it especially hard when their parents fight and argue or act with bitterness toward each other. You can’t do much to influence how your parents behave during a divorce, but you can ask them to do their best to call a truce to any bickering or unkind things they might be saying about each other. No matter what problems a couple may have faced, as parents they need to handle visiting arrangements peacefully to minimize the stress their kids may feel.

Be fair. Most teens say it’s important that parents don’t try to get them to " take sides." You need to feel free to relate to one parent without the other parent acting jealous, hurt, or mad. It’s unfair for anyone to feel that relating to one parent is being disloyal to the other or that the burden of one parent’s happiness is on your shoulders.

When parents find it hard to let go of bitterness or anger, or if they are depressed about the changes brought on by divorce, they can find help from a counselor or therapist who specializes in working with people who are dealing with divorce. This can help parents to get past the pain divorce may have created, to find personal happiness, and to lift any burdens from their kids.

Keep in touch. Going back and forth between two homes can be tough, especially if parents live far apart. It can be a good idea to keep in touch with a parent you see less often because of distance. Even a quick email just to say " I’m thinking of you" helps ease the feelings of missing each other. Making an effort to stay in touch when you’re apart can keep both of you up to date on everyday activities and ideas.

Work it out. You may want both parents to come to special events, like games, meets, plays, or recitals. But one parent may find it difficult to attend if the other is present. It helps if parents can figure out a way to make this work, especially because a teen may need to feel the support and presence of both parents even more during divorce. You might be able to come up with an idea for a compromise or solution to this problem and suggest it to both parents.

Talk about the future. Lots of teens whose parents divorce worry that their own plans for the future could be affected. Some are concerned that the costs of divorce (like legal fees and expenses of two households) might mean there will be less money for college or other things.

Pick a good time to tell your parents about your concerns – when there’s enough time to sit down with one or both parents to discuss how the divorce will affect you. Don’t worry about putting added stress on your parents. It’s better to bring your concerns into the open than to keep them to yourself and let worries or resentment build. There are solutions for most problems and counselors who can help teens and their parents find those solutions.

Live your life. Sometimes during a divorce, parents may be so caught up in their own changes it can feel like your own life is on hold. In addition to staying focused on your own plans and dreams, make sure you participate in as many of your normal activities as possible. When things are changing at home, it can really help to keep some things, such as school activities and friends, the same. Take care of yourself, too, by eating right and getting regular exercise – two great stress busters!

Let others support you. Talk about your feelings and reactions to the divorce with someone you trust. If you’re feeling down or upset, let your friends and family members support you. These feelings usually pass. If they don’t, and if you’re feeling depressed or stressed out, or if it’s hard to concentrate on your normal activities, let a counselor or therapist help you. There are therapists who specialize in working with teens who are dealing with divorce. Your parents, school counselor, or a doctor or other health professional can help you find one. Also, many communities and schools have support groups for kids and teens whose parents have divorced. It can really help to talk with other people your age who are going through similar experiences.

There will be ups and downs in the process, but teens can cope successfully with their parents’ divorce and the changes it brings. You may even discover some unexpected positives. Many teens find their parents are actually happier after the divorce or they may develop new and better ways of relating to both parents when they have separate time with each one.

Some teens become more compassionate and kind when a younger brother or sister needs their support and care. Siblings who are closer in age may form tighter bonds, learning to count on each other more because they’re facing the challenges of their parents’ divorce together. Coping well with divorce also can bring out strength and maturity in teens. They may become more responsible, independent, and thoughtful. Some become better problem solvers, better listeners, or better friends. Most teens learn – sometimes to their surprise – that they can make it through this difficult situation successfully.