Scene one

Time: Just before dawn the following day.

At Rise: There is no sound. Phillip descends the staircase, slowly, and stands looking at Paris, who is asleep on the sofa. The following scene is oblique. Neither Phi11ip nor Paris knows fully what is happening and the intentions of both father and son are veiled, obscure, until Paris is aware of life and the threat to life.

2.Read the whole text.

Phi11ip. Butch -

Paris. What?

Phi11ip. Wake up, Butch.

Paris. What time is it?

Phi11ip. Just before dawn. And your mother has packed during the night. She thinks she can leave us.

Paris. Leave us?

Phi11ip. Yes. Leave me and you.

Paris. I don’t believe you. Why did you wake me?

Phi11ip. Because I need you.

Paris. How?

Phi11ip. When I was big and you were little you needed me. Don’t you remember?

Paris. I guess so. When I was a baby I would come in and sleep between you and mother. Scared maybe, or I just wanted to. There was a swing somewhere in the neighborhood.

Phi11ip. Where was that?

Paris. On Cranberry Street. That’s as far back as I can remember. How far back can you remember, Daddy?

Phi11ip. I can remember sleeping between my mother and father too.

Paris. Is that as far back as your memory goes?

Phi11ip. Before that there was only darkness.

Paris. Darkness?

Phi11ip. Then, years later, there were blazing Georgia afternoons. Like burning glass, they were.

Paris. Georgia’s hot.

Phi11ip. Hot. Blazing and cruel. July was hot and August longer.

Paris. Granny has an air-conditioner in her bedroom.

Phi11ip. In those days there were no air-conditioners.

Paris. What did you do?

Phi11ip. We stewed in the heat

Paris. Stewed?

Phi11ip. We squatted in the back yard poking in those doodle-bug holes. Although I poked at those holes, year in, year out, I never once saw a doodle bug. Paris: What’s in those holes?

Phi11ip. That’s the mystery. You can squat with a broomstraw all summer long and never find out.

Paris. That’s no fun.

Phi11ip. I remember as a child picking Spanish bayonets. Remember that bush down South that has sharp spikes, like swords at the end?

Paris. I had a great time chasing girls with those Spanish bayonets. The girls run and holler. The boys run and chase. Not that you ever jab a girl. They’re sharp.

Phi11ip. I jabbed a girl once. Not a hard jab – just a light touch on the behind to make her know I meant business.

Paris. What did you do after that?

Phi11ip. It was the end of the game.

Paris. What time is it?

Phi11ip. Time for us to leave.

Paris. But Mother?

Phi11ip. I told you she’s been packing in the night. Silk stockings, brassieres, and all that crap.

Paris. I hate you when you talk like that about Mother.

Phi11ip. What did I say wrong? I love her. I can’t live without her. I have done everything to bring her back to us. I crawled on the floor like Dostoyevski.

Paris. Crawled? You didn’t care when Mother cried when you left her.

Phi11ip. I never left her. I did everything and what ever happens to me it’s her fault, and she’ll know it. But now we are going to be at peace. Where I go you and your mother will follow.

Paris. But where are you going?

Phi11ip. To zones and latitudes you never imagined.

Paris. In the Arctic Zone the sun shines at midnight. But tell me, Daddy, where you are going!

Phi11ip. To a place more remote than Kilimanjaro, more vacant than the moonlight in the Sahara.

Paris. Africa?

Phi11ip. Not specially.

Paris. I always wanted to go to Africa. I adore travel and adventure.

Phi11ip. Do you, Butch?

Paris. When we went to Yellowstone Park I thought it would be an adventure, but the grizzly bears ate out of your hand and slobbered. It was tame. Without your blarney, Daddy, where are you going?

Phi11ip. Do you want me to tell you a story?

Paris. I feel half asleep and still dreaming.

Phi11ip. In the Kingdom of Heaven...

Paris. What kind of a story is that?

Phi11ip. A Bible story. In the Kingdom of Heaven a man was going to travel to a far-off country. And so he called his two servants –

Paris. It’s funny. The Bible always talks about servants. Mother says to me, “Never say servants, say housekeeper, cleaning maid, or anything – but never servant. Otherwise they quit! ”

Phillip. The master delivered to the servants his goods –

Paris. Why did he do that?

Phillip. Because he would be gone a long time.

Paris. What goods did he give them?

Phillip. All of his money – his talents.

Paris. I never thought of talents as money. To me talents mean singing and dancing.

Phillip. In the Bible talents are money. It was a way of exchange. Anyway, the master gave five talents to the first servant and to the other just one. And straightway the master left for his journey. Straightway – I love that word. And the one who received five talents traded them with judgment and made ten.

Paris. On the stock exchange?

Phillip. Something like that. For a long time the master stayed away, and when he returned he went to the man who had five talents and the man brought forth five more. “Well done, ” the master said. “You have used your talents. Enter into the joy of the Lord.”

Paris. You always spend your money. Granny says that if you had bought stock you would have made a fortune by now. Stocks have gone up.

Phi11ip. Have they, Butch?

Paris. And you have so many talents, Daddy.

Phi11ip. Then the master went to the servant who had received one talent and the one-talent guy said, “Master, I have hid my talent under the earth - it is still there.”

Paris. Hid it under the earth? Why did he do that?

Phi11ip. Because the master was a hard master and the servant was afraid.

Paris. What did the master say?

Phi11i p. The master said, “I will take your one talent and give it to the servant who has ten, for to everyone that has, shall be given. But from him that hath not, shall be taken away even that which he has.”

Paris. That’s not fair. To me the Bible is nine times out of ten unfair. In fact the Bible is awfully downbeat.

Phi11ip. You’re right, Butch. It’s not fair.

Paris. Hattie Brown thinks I have talent. She claims that when I play the guitar I’m as cool as Elvis Presley. When she says that, I wiggle my hips like him – it’s nice to have talent.

Phi1lip. It’s better to develop it.

Paris. When I sing like that, Hattie howls.

Phi11ip. Does she, Butch?

Paris. Why did you wake me up, at this unearthly hour?

Phi11ip. For company.

Paris. Do you have a hangover, Daddy?

Phi11ip. No.

Paris. You look white as death.

Phi11ip. I’ll be all right, Butch. Once I’m on the road.

Paris. You should not be going anywhere alone. (Paris starts to dress.)

Phi11ip. What are you doing?

Paris. Getting dressed. I ought to go with you.

Phi11ip. It would be company.

Paris. But where are we going and why are you going? First you said it was Africa. Then you said not. Is it Mexico?

Phi1lip. No.

Paris. Is it Europe?

Phi11ip. No, Butch.

Paris. Mother doesn’t like Europe. They don’t have screens on the windows and you always get the trots.

Phi11ip. It is not Africa, not Mexico, not Europe. No place your mother has been or me or you. She thought she could leave us but she can’t.

Paris. Without your baloney, Daddy, what’s this all about? Where are you going?

Phillip. You’ll know when we get there.

Paris. But Mother?

Phi11ip. I told you forty times she’s packing...

Paris. Packing? Tomorrow is the day I was going to try that reel and tackle. Try it out in the pond. Tomorrow – that is, today.

Phi11ip. Suppose there are no tomorrows – that is today?

Paris. What are you doing?

Phi11ip. Getting my books.

Paris. Why?

Phillip. The ancient savage kings gathered their slave, their ship, their goblet for the voyage.

Paris. What voyage?

Phi11ip. The last one.

Paris. You talk so creepy. Strange and downbeat, I’m scared.

Phi11ip. Why are you scared?

Paris. If I knew why, I would not be so scared.

Phi11ip. It’s almost daybreak.

Paris. I’m wide awake now.

Phi11ip. It’s time to get started.

Paris. I can’t go anywhere like this. (Indicating his socks.) The socks don’t mate. I have on one white sock and one red.

Phi11ip. Is that the only reason you don’t want to come?

Paris. Not only that.

Phi11ip. I remember the October moons of my childhood. The hound dog would be baying. When there was a ring around the moon it was a sign of coming frost. Have you ever seen frost flowers, Butch? With its cold and delicate designs that come on window-panes – they are rose-colored and gold.

Paris. I never saw that.

Phi11ip. I’m not blaming you, Son.

Paris. Blaming me?

Phi11ip. No. It operates like this. In our cold house where there was no central heating, Uncle Willie used to light the kitchen stove first thing in the morning and put on the grits for breakfast – old people get up very early in the morning And as the room would warm with the glowing kitchen stove, outside there would still be cold and wintertime. Then the frost flowers would come on the windowpanes. Jack Frost had painted them we always said.

Paris. This is just the time to dig for angleworms. You find them better just at dawn.

Phi11ip. Or late twilight. I, too, have dug for angleworms.

Paris. Hattie and I are going to start early. Go to the pond. And if the fish aren’t biting there, we’ll go to Rockland Lake.

Phi11ip. You won’t come with me?

Paris. My day is important and already planned. Some other time, Daddy.

Phi11ip. I, too, remember sleeping between my mother and my father and having chased girls with Spanish bayonets. I have known both frost flowers and angleworms. And I have known that time when a song on the street and a voice from childhood all fitted and I was a writer and writing every day. And I was not alone then. There was love. I could love and did not struggle against being loved. It was company, anyhow. I remember everything - and at that instant will every moment be a reflection of every moment that has gone before? (Almost whispers.) I can’t stand it.

Paris (shouts). Mother!

Phi11ip (whispers). Now I prefer only darkness. (He exits. Mo11ie enters.)

Mo11ie. What on earth, Lambie –?

Paris. My daddy.

(We hear the sound of the car.)

Mo11ie. What about Daddy? Where is he going – at this hour?

Paris. I don’t know, Mother. I just don’t know.

Mo11ie (goes to window, looking after the car). Lambie, please, put down that guitar.

THE CURTAIN FALLS

3.Answer the questions.

1)What is Phillip going to do? What gives away his intentions?

2)Do father and son understand each other well? Give examples of such “misunderstandings”.

3)At some points of their conversation Phillip and Paris switch over to a different topic unexpectedly. Why? Find such sentences.

4)In some cases Phillip doesn’t give logical answers to the questions Paris asks. E.g. “What time is it? ” “Time for us to leave”. Find some examples of such “illogical” answers. Are they as illogical as they seem?

4.Identify the speaker of the following phrases. Recall the situations and comment on them.

1)Before that there was only darkness.

2)I adore travel and adventure.

3)It would be company.

4)Stocks have gone up.

5)It was company, anyhow.

6)That’s not fair.

7)My day is important and already planned.

8)Scared maybe, or I just wanted to.

9)Straightway – I love that word.

5.Judging by the episode you have read, what are the relations between Phillip, Mollie and Paris?

6.Is Phillip really going to kill himself? What proves it?

7.Some of the words in Ex. I 1. are informal. Give their neutral and formal equivalents.

8.Comment on the following grammar phenomena.

1)When I was a baby I would come in and sleep between you and mother.

2)Then, years later, there were blazing Georgia afternoons. Like burning glass, they were.

3)Then the master went to the servant who had received one talent and the one-talent guy said…

4)You should not be going anywhere alone.

5)The ancient savage kings gathered their slave, their ship, their goblet for the voyage.

6)Uncle Willie used to light the kitchen stove first thing in the morning and put on the grits for breakfast…

7)And if the fish aren’t biting there, we’ll go to Rockland Lake.

III 1.Put down five phrases to express your attitude to the extract from the play you have read. Compare them with those of your groupmates.

2.Act out an episode from the play. Justify your choice of intonation patterns and comment on the behaviour of the characters.

3.How far back can you remember? Describe the most striking events of your childhood.

4.Read the additional texts and say what you think.

a)Every people has a quite definite image of what a child is at birth. Russians, for example, see the newborn as so strong that they swaddle it firmly to protect it from harming itself. The French, in contrast, see the baby as fragile and vulnerable to anything harmful in the environment – and they softly swaddle the infant to keep it quietly safe.

In Bali a baby is not given a human name at birth. Until it seems clear it will live, the Balinese refer to it as a caterpillar or a mouse. At three months, when it is given a name, it becomes a participating human being whose mother, speaking for it, says the words of polite social response. But if the baby dies before this, people reproach it, saying “You didn’t stay long enough. Next time stay and eat rice with us”. For the Balinese believe in reincarnation. They believe the “soul”, without any specific personality, is reborn every fourth generation within the same family.

Margaret Mead

A New Understanding of Childhood

b)Parents today appear to have much uncertainty about their roles as moral guides. Part of this uncertainty is a reaction against the fear techniques that were employed in moral teaching in former generations. Since today’s parent does not wish to teach his child moral attitudes through threats or exaggerated horror or fearful warnings he seems afraid to show any moral reactions to his child as if he might then create excessive guilt feelings in the child. This means that many parents who have firm moral beliefs about lying, stealing, murder and destruction fail to transmit them to their children in a profound and meaningful way. Parents tolerate the moral lapses or even the absence of moral principles in their children way beyond the period when we can expect a child to have incorporated moral values in his own personality.

Selma Freiberg

The Magic Years

c)Every culture, in every time throughout history, has commemorated the transition of a human being from one state in life to another. Birth, the emergence into manhood, graduation from school at various levels, birthdays, marriage, death – each of these outstanding steps is acknowledged by a ceremony of some sort, always public, the guests in effect becoming witnesses to the statement of life’s ongoingness, of the natural order of history. To insure the special significance of the rite of passage, its apartness from any other event of the day, these rituals usually require pageantry, costumed adornment, and are accompanied by gift-bearing and feasting. We wear black to funerals, bring presents to christenings and birthday parties, get loaded at wakes, eat ourselves sick at bar mitzvahs. Birth, marriage, and death, to be sure, are the most elemental and major steps, and as there is only one of those ritual commemorations for which we are actually, fully present, the wedding becomes, for mankind, its most vital rite of passage. And for this reason it is anchored at the very core of civilization.

Marcia Seligson

The Eternal Bliss Macnine: America’s Way of Wedding

5.What problems can arise in a family? How can they be solved?

6.Speak about family customs and traditions (in our country and abroad).

Unit 7. The Unicorn in the Garden (by James Thurber)

I 1.Work in groups of two. Look at the following words and think of a story that might combine them all. Then reorder the words according to the order in which they appear in your story. You can use any form of the verb and not necessarily the –ing one.

2.When you have decided upon a story, change partners. Ask each other as many questions as you can to learn further details or clarify some points.

3.Study the words. Check up the pronunciation.

as crazy as a jay bird – insane (slang; now out-of-date)

booby – someone who is insane

booby-hatch – an insane asylum, a hospital for the mentally ill (slang; now out-of-date)

breakfast nook – a corner of the kitchen with a small table and, often, high-backed benches; popular in American homes in the 1930’s and 40’s

browsing – here, eating slowly, as animals do in a field

cropping – eating; used to describe the way animals eat the top of plants

Don’t count your boobies until they are hatched. The actual proverb is “Don’t count your chickens until they are hatched” meaning don’t count on something before it happens. Cf. hatch – to break out of an egg and hatch – to put someone in a booby-hatch

gloat (n) – from the verb “gloat” – to look at with selfish delight

gravely – seriously

high heart – great happiness

mythical – fictitious, imaginary

roused – woke up, awakened (past form)

strait-jacket – a white jacket with very long arms, the ends of which are tied behind someone’s back to keep him still; used to subdue insane people

subdue – overcome, bring under control

unicorn – an animal like a horse, with a horn in the middle of its forehead

II 1.Read the text and reorder the words from Ex I 1. according to what happens in the story.

Once upon a sunny morning a man who sat in a breakfast nook looked up from his scrambled eggs to see a white unicorn with a gold horn quietly cropping the roses in the garden. The man went up to the bedroom where his wife was still asleep and woke her. “There’s a unicorn in the garden”, he said. “Eating roses”. She opened one unfriendly eye and looked at him. “The unicorn is a mythical beast”, she said, and turned her back on him. The man walked slowly downstairs and out into the garden. The unicorn was still there; he was now browsing among the tulips. “Here, unicorn”, said the man, and he pulled up a lily and gave it to him. The unicorn ate it gravely. With a high heart, because there was a unicorn in his garden, the man went upstairs and roused his wife again. “The unicorn”, he said, “ate a lily”. His wife sat up in bed and looked at him, coldly. “You are a booby”, she said, “and I am going to have you put in the booby-hatch”. The man, who had never liked the words “booby” and “booby-hatch”, and who liked them even less on a shining morning when there was a unicorn in the garden, thought for a moment. “We’ll see about that”, he said. He walked over to the door. “He has a golden horn in the middle of his forehead”, he told her. Then he went back to the garden to watch the unicorn; but the unicorn had gone away. The man sat down among the roses and went to sleep.

As soon as the husband had gone out of the house, the wife got up and dressed as fast as she could. She was very excited and there was a gloat in her eye. She telephoned the police and she telephoned a psychiatrist; she told them to hurry to her house and bring a strait-jacket. When the police and the psychiatrist arrived they sat down in chairs and looked at her, with great interest. “My husband”, she said, “saw a unicorn this morning”. The police looked at the psychiatrist and the psychiatrist looked at the police. “He told me it ate a lily”, she said. The psychiatrist looked at the police and the police looked at the psychiatrist. “He told me it had a golden horn in the middle of its forehead”, she said. At a solemn signal from the psychiatrist, the police leaped from their chairs and seized the wife. They had a hard time subduing her, for she put up a terrific struggle, but they finally subdued her. Just as they got her into the strait-jacket, the husband came back into the house.

“Did you tell your wife you saw a unicorn? ” asked the police. “Of course not”, said the husband. “The unicorn is a mythical beast”. “That’s all I wanted to know”, said the psychiatrist. “Take her away. I’m sorry, sir, but your wife is as crazy as a jay bird”. So they took her away, cursing and screaming, and shut her up in an institution. The husband lived happily ever after.

MORAL: Don’t count your boobies until they are hatched.

2.Answer the questions.

1)What does the setting tell you about the man’s style of life?

2)Why did he want to tell his wife about the unicorn?

3)What suggests that the husband was disappointed by his wife’s reaction? Find some words in the text characterizing the man’s elated mood and the woman’s anger.

4)Why did it make the man so happy to have a unicorn in his garden?

5)Was the husband worried by his wife’s threat?

6)Why was there a “gloat” in her eye?

7)Why did the police and the psychiatrist look at the woman “with great interest” when they arrived?

8)Why did the husband respond as he did to the police’s question?

3.Explain the moral of the story.

4.How do husband and wife differ in temperament and character? Complete the table below to answer the question.

III 1.“Don’t put all your eggs in one basket, ” is an English proverb similar to the moral of this story. Is there a proverb in your culture which has the same moral?

2.In what way is Thurber’s fable similar to others you know? In what way is it different?

3.Here are some jokes showing how husbands and wives differ in character. How do these jokes refer to the main idea of the story?

1) “I love thee still, ” said the quiet husband to chattering wife.

2) If your wife wants to learn to drive, don’t stand in her way.

3) “I am sorry to say, ” said the doctor, “your wife is lying at death’s door.” “Well, ” answered the husband, “I hope you pull her through.”

4) “He boasts he runs things in his family.”

“He does – the lawn mower, the washing machine, vacuum cleaner, baby carriage and the errands.”

5)Husband. I warned you about exceeding the Feed limit.

6)Wife. We’ve got to fire the chauffer. He’s nearly killed me four times.

Husband. He’s a good man. Let’s give him another chance.

4.Additional task.

The following passage is an extract from a story called Murder Mystery 1 which was produced in nineteen seconds by a computer in 1973. As you can see all the sentences are simple sentences and no use is made of link-words or reference between different sentences. Can you rewrite this short passage to make it look more natural? This will mean adding words and putting some of the sentences together.

The butler announced tea.

Everyone went into the garden. The butler served tea. The day was cool. The sky was cloudy. The garden was nice. The flowers were pretty. Marion complimented Lady Buxley.

Ronald talked with Marion.

Tea time was over.

Everyone went to the parlor.

The cook went to the kitchen. Maggie prepared dinner.

Dr Hume asked Edward to play tennis. Edward agreed. Lord Edward went to the tennis court with Dr Hume. They played tennis. Dr Hume was the good player. Edward played tennis well.

Dr Bartholomew stopped playing tennis. Edward stopped playing tennis.

Everyone went to the dining room. Everyone sat down. The butler served the food. Supper started.

Marion talked with Florence. Florence argued with Marion. Marion said that Florence was idiotic.

Florence talked with Lady Buxley.

Supper was over. The men went to the parlor. The men smoked fat smelly stogies. The men drank sherry. The women went to the drawing room. The women gossiping drank coffee.

Everyone went to the parlor.

Marion talked with Jane.

James went to the library. James read the good paperback. Edward asked Ronald to play tennis. Ronald agreed. Ronald went to the tennis court with Lord Edward. They played tennis.

John suggested the game of bridge. Lady Buxley agreed. Dr Bartholomew Hume agreed. They played bridge.

The servants went to bed. Everyone went to bed.

Unit 8. The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (by James Thurber)

I 1.Study the words. Check up the pronunciation.

II 1.Read the text.

“We’re going through! ” The Commander’s voice was like thin ice breaking. He wore his full-dress uniform, with the heavily braided white cap pulled down rakishly over one cold grey eye. “We can’t make it, sir. It’s spoiling for a hurricane, if you ask me.” “I’m not asking you, Lieutenant Berg, ” said the Commander. “Throw on the power lights! Rev her up to 8.500! We’re going through! ” The pounding of the cylinders increased: ta-pocketa-pocketa-pocketa-pocketa-pocketa. The Commander stared at the ice forming on the pilot window. He walked over and twisted a row of complicated dials. “Switch on №8 auxiliary! ” he shouted. “Switch on №8 auxiliary! ” repeated Lieutenant Berg. The crew, bending to their various tasks in the huge, hurtling eight-engined Navy Hydroplane, looked at each other and grinned. “The Old Man’ll get us through, ” they said to one another. “The Old Man ain’t afraid of Hell! ”…

“Not so fast! You’re driving too fast! ” said Mrs Mitty. “What are you driving so fast for? ”

“Humm? ” said Walter Mitty. He looked at his wife, in the seat beside him, with shocked astonishment. She seemed grossly unfamiliar, like a strange woman who had yelled at him in a crowd. “You were up to fifty-five, ” she said. “You know I don’t like to go more than forty. You were up to fifty-five! ” Walter Mitty drove on toward Waterbury in silence. “You’re tensed up again, ” said Mrs Mitty. “It’s one of your days. I wish you’d let Doctor Renshaw look you over.”

Walter Mitty stopped the car in front of the building where his wife went to have her hair done. “Remember to get those overshoes while I’m having my hair done, ” she said. “I don’t need overshoes, ” said Mitty. She put her mirror back into her bag. “We’ve been through all that, ” she said, getting out of the car. “You’re not a young man any longer.” He raced the engine a little. “Why don’t you wear your gloves? Have you lost your gloves? ” Walter Mitty reached in a pocket and brought out the gloves. He put them on, but after she had turned and gone into the building and he had driven on to a red light, he took them off again. “Pick it up, brother! ” snapped a cop as the light changed, and Mitty hastily pulled on his gloves and lurched ahead. He drove around the streets aimlessly for a time, and then he drove past the hospital on his way to the parking lot.

…“It’s the millionaire banker, Wellington McMillan, ” said the pretty nurse. “Yes? ” said Walter Mitty, removing his gloves slowly. “Who has the case? ” “Dr Renshaw and Dr Benbow, but there are two specialists here, Dr Remington from New York and Mr Pritchard-Mitford from London. He flew over.” A door opened down a long, cool corridor and Dr Renshaw came out. He looked distraught and haggard. “Hello, Mitty, ” he said. “We’re having the devil’s own time with McMillan, the millionaire banker and close personal friend of Roosevelt. Obstreosis of the ductal tract. Tertiary. Wish you’d take a look at him.” “Glad to, ” said Mitty.

In the operating room there were whispered introductions: “Dr Remington. Dr Mitty. Mr Pritchard-Mitford, Dr Mitty.” “I’ve read your book on streptothricosis, ” said Pritchard-Mitford, shaking hands. “A brilliant performance, sir.” “Thank you, ” said Walter Mitty. “Didn’t know you were in the States, Mitty, ” grumbled Remington. “Coals to Newcastle, bringing Mitford and me up here for a tertiary.” “You are s very kind.” Said Mitty. A huge, complicated machine, connected to the operating table, with many tubes and wires, began at this moment to go pocketa-pocketa-pocketa. “The new anaesthetizer is giving way! ” shouted an intern. “There is no one in the East who knows how to fix it! ” “Quiet, man! ” said Mitty, in a low, cool voice. He sprang to the machine which was now going pocketa-pocketa-queep-pocketa-queep. He began fingering delicately a row of glistening dials. “Give me a fountain-pen! ” he snapped. Someone handed him a fountain pen. He pulled a faulty piston out of the machine and inserted the pen in its place. “That will hold for ten minutes, ” he said. “Get on with the operation.” A nurse hurried over and whispered to Renshaw, and Mitty saw the man turn pale. “Coreopsis has set in, ” said Renshaw nervously. “If you would take over, Mitty? ” Mitty looked at him and at the craven figure of Benbow who drank, and at the grave, uncertain faces of the two great specialists. “If you wish, ” he said. They slipped a white gown on him, he adjusted a mask and drew on thin gloves; nurses handed him shining…

“Back it up, Mac! Look out for that Buick! ” Walter Mitty jammed on the brakes. “Wrong lane, Mac, ” said the parking-lot attendant, looking at Mitty closely. “Gee, Yeh, ” muttered Mitty. He began cautiously to back out of the lane marked “Exit only.” “Leave her sit there, ” said the attendant “I’ll put her away.” Mitty got out of the car. “Hey, better leave the key.” “Oh, ” said Mitty, handing the man the ignition key. The attendant vaulted into the car, backed it up with insolent skill, and put it where it belonged.

“They’re so damn cocky, ” thought Walter Mitty, walking along Main Street; they think they know everything. Once he had tried to take his chains off, outside New Mitford and he had got them wound around the axles. A man had to come out in a wrecking car and unwind them, a young grinning garageman. Since then Mrs Mitty always made him drive to a garage to have the chains taken off. The next time he thought, I’ll wear my right arm in a sling and they’ll see I couldn’t possibly take the chains off myself. He kicked at the slush on the side-walk. “Overshoes, ” he said to himself, and he began looking for a shoe store.

When he came out in the street again, with the overshoes in a box under his arm, Walter Mitty began to wonder what the other thing was his wife had told him to get. She had told him twice, before they set out from their house for Waterbury. In a way he hated these weekly trips to town – he was always getting something wrong. Kleenex, he thought, Squibb’s razor blades? No. Toothpaste, toothbrush, bicarbonate, carborandum, initiative and referendum? He gave it up. But she would remember it. “Where’s the what’s-its-name? ” she would ask. “Don’t tell me you forgot the what’s-its-name. ” A newsboy went by shouting something about the Waterbury trial.

“Perhaps this will refresh your memory.” The District Attorney suddenly thrust a heavy automatic at the quiet figure on the witness stand. “Have you ever seen this before? ” Walter Mitty took the gun and examined it expertly. “This is my Webley-Vickes 50.80; ” he said calmly. An excited buzz ran around the courtroom. The judge rapped for order. “You are a crack shot with any sort of firearms, I believe? ” said the District Attorney, insinuatingly. “Objection! ” shouted Mitty’s attorney. “We have shown that he wore his right arm in a sling on the night of the fourteenth of July.”

Walter Mitty raised his hand briefly and the bickering attorneys were stilled. “With any known make of gun, ” he said evenly, “I could have killed Gregory Fitzhurst at three hundred feet with my left hand.” Pandemonium broke loose in the courtroom. A woman’s scream rose above the bedlam and suddenly a lovely, dark-haired girl was in Waller Mitty’s arms. The District Attorney struck at her savagely. Mitty let the man have it on the point of the chin. “You miserable cur! ”…

“Puppy biscuit, ” said Walter Mitty. He stopped walking and the buildings of Waterbury rose up out of the misty courtroom and surrounded him again. A woman who was passing laughed. “He said “Puppy biscuit” to himself, ” she said to her companion. “That man said “Puppy biscuit.”’ Walter Mitty hurried on. He went into an A& P, not the first one he came to but a smaller one farther up the street. “I want some biscuit for small, young dogs, ” he said to the clerk. “Any special brand, sir? ”

The greatest pistol shot in the world thought a moment. “It says “Puppies bark for it” on the box, ” said Walter Mitty.

His wife would be through at the hairdresser’s in fifteen minutes. Mitty saw in looking at his watch, unless they had trouble drying it; sometimes they had trouble drying it. She didn’t like to get to the hotel first, she would want him to be there waiting for her as usual. He found a big leather chair in the lobby, facing a window, and he put the overshoes and the puppy biscuits on the floor beside it. He picked up an old copy of Liberty and sank down into the chair. “Can Germany conquer the World Through the Air? ” Walter Mitty looked at the pictures of bombing planes and of ruined streets.

…“The cannonading has got the wind up in young Raleigh, sir, ” said the sergeant. Captain Mitty looked up at him through tousled hair. “Get him to bed, ” he said wearily. “With the others. I’ll fly alone.” “But you can’t, sir, ” said the sergeant anxiously. “It takes two men to handle that bomber and the Archies are pounding hell out of the air. Von Richtman’s circus is between here and Saulier.” “Somebody’s got to get that ammunition dump, ” said Mitty. “I’m going over. Spot of brandy? ” He poured a drink for the sergeant and one for himself. War thundered and whined around the dugout and battered at the door. There was a rending of wood and splinters flew through the room. “A bit of a near thing, ” said Captain Mitty carelessly. “The box barrage is closing in, ” said the sergeant. “We only live once, Sergeant, ” said Mitty, with his faint, fleeting smile. “Or do we? ” He poured another brandy and tossed it off. “I never see a man could hold his brandy like you, sir.” Captain Mitty stood up and strapped on his huge Webley-Vickers automatic. “It’s forty kilometers through hell, sir, ” said the sergeant. Mitty finished one last brandy. “After all, ” he said softly, “what isn’t? ” The pounding of the cannon increased, there was the rat-rat-tatting of machine guns, and from somewhere came the menacing pocketa-pocketa-pocketa of the new flame-throwers. Walter Mitty walked to the door of the dugout humming “Aupres de ma Blonde.” He turned and waved to the sergeant. “Cheerio! ” he said…

Something struck his shoulder. “I’ve been looking all over this hotel for you, ” said Mrs Mitty. “Why do you have to hide in this old chair? How did you expect me to find you? ” “Things close in, ” said Walter Mitty vaguely. “What? ” Mrs Mitty said. “Did you get what’s-its-name? The puppy biscuit? What’s in that box? ” “Overshoes, ” said Mitty. “Couldn’t you have put them on in the store? ” “I was thinking, ” said Walter Mitty. “Does it ever occur to you that I am sometimes thinking? ” “I’m going to take your temperature when I get you home, ” she said.

They went out through the revolving doors that made a faintly derisive sound whistling sound when you pushed them. It was two blocks to the parking lot. At the drugstore on the corner she said, “Wait here for me. I forgot something. I won’t be a minute.” She was more than a minute. Walter Mitty lighted a cigarette. It began to rain, rain with sleet in it. He stood up against the wall of the drugstore, smoking… He put his shoulders back and his heels together. “To hell with the handkerchief, ” said Walter Mitty scornfully. He took one last drag on his cigarette and snapped it away. Then, with that faint, fleeting smile playing about his lips, he faced the firing squad; erect and motionless, proud and disdainful. Walter Mitty, the Undefeated, inscrutable to the last.

(From My World and Welcome to it by James Thurber)

2.Fill in the chart.

3.Answer the questions.

1) How does Walter Mitty picture himself in his dreams? How can you describe his real personality?

2) What can you say about Mrs Mitty? Do Mr and Mrs Mitty get on with each other?

3) Does Mrs Mitty know anything about Mr Mitty’s secret life?

4) Does Walter Mitty often day-dream? What causes his day-dreams?

4.Find in words in the text that mean the following.

циферблат, шкала, диск

дополнительный, запасной

нестись, мчаться

ухмыляться

резко прерывать, рявкать

наглый, дерзкий

слякоть, грязь

затяжка

презрительный, надменный

непостижимый, загадочный, непроницаемый

5.Complete each sentence with the correct colour.

1) His supervisor gave him a _ look when he turned up late for the third time this week.

2) I must be on some kind of _ list because I have a lot of difficulty getting credit.

3) We’re waiting for the _ light from head office to launch our publicity campaign.

4) Local residents protested when they heard a factory was going to be built in a _ belt area.

5) I won’t believe we’ve got the contract until see it down in _ and _.

6) Among the _ goods, washing machines are our best sellers.

7) There were several _ faces when these so-called financial experts found that they had been tricked!

8) We need to cut through all the _ tape and speed up the decision-making process.

9) That’s a bit of a _ area. It’s difficult to say who exactly has responsibility for recruitment.

10) The company found itself several thousand pounds in the _ after spending so much on improving its production line.

11) They’re looking for a _ knight to help them fight the takeover bid.

12) Then, out of the _, she offered me a job managing her new restaurant. You can imagine my surprise.

13) We have to roll out the _ carpet for him as he’s one of our best customers.

14) The _ revolution has meant that food exports have increased dramatically in the past few years.

III 1.Do you agree that day-dreaming is a way of escaping reality?

2.Describe how you picture yourself in your dreams. What brings you back to reality?

3.Additional task.

Read the text sentence by sentence. Find logical mistakes.

a) My neighbour John has just called in to say that he and his wife can come to my party next Wednesday. So we’ve arranged to meet outside the cinema at about six o’clock. The main film showing is the latest James Bond film, starring Sophia Loren, Henry Kissinger and Clark Gable. After the service the two of us will probably go for a drink. It’s a long time since I saw John and his wife, so I’m looking forward to an enjoyable Saturday evening with them.

b) If you want a new car for the family then come along to our surgery and look at our latest discoveries. We have imported cars as well as a wide range produced in British kitchens.

There are no vehicles here on display so just come along any time to see them.

Alternatively you could phone and we’d be delighted to give you our catalogues personally. We are open from 3 a.m. – 7 a.m., seven days a year and are looking forward to buying from you the car you’ve been dreaming of.

Unit 9. Bridget Jones’s Diary (by Helen Fielding)