Chapter twenty-four. It was Sunday, nearly noon, but Ginny couldn't bring herself to get out of bed

IT WAS SUNDAY, nearly noon, but Ginny couldn't bring herself to get out of bed. For the last two weeks, she had put on a brave front, appearing cheerful in front of Nana, eating meals with a vigor she did not feel and participating in meaningless conversations when her mind was elsewhere. Elsewhere! She laughed. Her mind wasn't elsewhere. It was on Kara. It had been since the moment she had walked out of her life. Each day, she went to the store, waiting for the phone to ring. Each time the bell jingled, she looked up, hoping to find Kara standing in the doorway. Finally, yesterday, she had given up. Kara wasn't coming back. Kara didn't want her in her life. Kara didn't need her.

And so she had stayed in bed. Hiding. She could not put on a brave front any longer. She had told Nana she wasn't feeling well, which, of course, was the truth and Nana had brought her soup to eat, which still stood on the nightstand beside her. She couldn't force down another meal. She was certain that she would never eat again.

She rolled over, wishing for the pain in her heart to go away. Never in her life had she felt so alone. The pain of her childhood could not even compare. She loved Kara. Of that, at least, she was certain. But why had Kara run? What was she afraid of? Was Ginny's need of her too much? Had she felt smothered? Ginny's first thought was her inexperience in bed, but she knew that wasn't the reason. Their lovemaking had been too passionate, to intense for her to have imagined it. Kara had enjoyed it as much as Ginny had. There was another reason for her leaving.

The knock on her door cut short her thoughts and she called for Nana to come in.

" How are you feeling? "

" Better, " Ginny lied.

" Good. I was worried about you. You're never sick, " Nana said.

Ginny turned away, her eyes looking out the window, seeing nothing. She was on the verge of tears and she didn't want Nana to see. She would never be able to explain tears. She had never cried in front of Nana.

" You didn't eat your soup, Ginny, " Nana said.

" I didn't think I could keep it down, " she said. " But I'm better now."

" Let me heat it for you, " Nana said with relief.

" Okay. I'll get up now, I think, " she said.

Nana smiled and left her and Ginny made herself rise, tossing off the protective covers. Staying in bed, hiding, would not solve anything.

Later that week, as Ginny choked down another meal, she knew what she had to do. She had to find Kara. She had to know the reason she left. She could deal with the truth. But not knowing was slowly driving her crazy.

" Nana, things will slow down in a few weeks, once the season winds down. If I left for a couple of days, would you and Jessica be okay? "

" Of course, Ginny. Where are you going? "

" To Seattle, " she said.

Nana's face broke into a smile. " I knew it. Your forced cheerfulness these last few weeks couldn't fool me." She beamed at Ginny. " You're going to Phil, aren't you? "

Phil. Always Phil, Ginny thought. " I'm just going to Seattle, " Ginny said tiredly. " Not necessarily to see Phil."

" Oh, I know you've been miserable since he left, " Nana continued. " Of course we can handle the store. You stay gone as long as you need. Oh, Ginny, I'm so glad you're going...."

Ginny left her protest unspoken as Nana rambled on and on about Phil. She simply stopped listening. She was more concerned about how she was going to find Kara in a city the size of Seattle.