Chapter Sixteen. Cody woke up in a small crowded room, its windows wet with condensation, the sky beyond them a lethargic gray

Cody woke up in a small crowded room, its windows wet with condensation, the sky beyond them a lethargic gray. Shivering, she closed her eyes and willed her surroundings to disappear. Janet was still asleep, her cheeks rosy and her long brown hair tumbling across the pillow. Studying her best friend, Cody felt a rush of affection and wished for a moment that she could have fallen in love with Janet.

Life would have been so uncomplicated. Janet was calm, happy, a great cook and enthusiastic gardener. They liked the same music, movies and sports. Their backgrounds were similar and they lived in the same city. What more could a woman want?

Cody conjured up a vision of making love with Janet. It seemed to revolve around cuddling her and stroking her hair. It felt comforting instead of exciting. She stretched out an experimental finger and touched Janet’s cheek, then wriggled a little closer so she could put an arm around her.

Janet opened sleepy eyes, smiled at Cody and moved into her arms with a sigh of contentment. “I’ve missed you so much, ” she said and kissed Cody’s cheek.

“I’ve missed you, too.” Cody gently kissed her mouth.

Their eyes met. Cody caught the uncertainty in Janet’s, but she still slid her hand under her friend’s pajama jacket and stroked her back. She felt so different from Annabel; she was rounder and softer. Cody continued her exploration and kissed her again.

“Cody! ” Janet pressed her hands flat against Cody’s chest, pushing her away. “What are you doing? ”

Cody’s heart thumped and her head felt heavy. “I—” She wavered. What indeed? “I want to make love to you, ” she said flatly.

Janet examined Cody’s face. “Are you sure? I mean, I’ve had more romantic propositions.”

Cody frowned. “I—” she began. “Oh, damn.” She rolled restlessly onto her back and heaved a profound sigh. “Hell, I’m sorry, Janet. I’m just being a schmuck.”

Janet laughed. “Well I’m about to be nominated for the idiot of the year award. If this gets out I’ll be a laughing stock at the club. The only dyke in Wellington fool enough to turn Cody Stanton down. Ever since word got out about you and Margaret, the phone’s been running hot with desperates offering me bribes to fix them up with you.”

“You’re joking! ” Despite herself, Cody grinned. “With me? ”

“False modesty never did suit you, ” Janet said pertly. “If I could sell timeshares in your body, I’d be a rich woman.”

She paused, pulled Cody into an embrace and kissed her sensually. “See, ” she said against her mouth after a moment. “Nice, but… nothing. Who is she? ”

Cody met her friend’s amused brown eyes candidly. “Her name is Annabel, Annabel Worth. And she...we...”

“I see, ” Janet said, with expressive eyebrows. “Tell me more.” She got out of bed, hurriedly pulling on a thick chenille robe. “Talk to me while I make coffee.”

Cody threw on some clothes and padded after her. The sight of Janet’s pink Formica kitchen table and padded chrome chairs made her feel safe somehow. “Have you ever fallen in love at first sight? ” she said, plunking herself down.

“Lots of times.” Janet cranked up the coffee grinder and shoved thick slices of cinnamon bread in the toaster. “Especially with Helena Bonham Carter.”

“God.” Cody knocked her forehead playfully against the table. “I mean with someone you can actually smell.”

“Twice, ” Janet said. “And as you know it was a very bad idea both times.”

“Suzannah and Connie, right? ”

“Don’t let’s go there. I’ll only want to cut my wrists. So… would this be some roundabout way of telling me you’ve met the love of your life? ”

Cody sighed. “She’s wonderful.”

“Which explains why you propositioned me so charmingly a few minutes ago, ” Janet said with cool irony. “I’m sorry, did I miss something? ”

“The toast’s ready, ” Cody muttered.

Janet buttered the hot slices and stacked them on a plate. Pouring coffee into their cups, she said, “If she’s so wonderful what the hell are you doing back here? ”

“It’s a long story.” Cody sipped her coffee, thankful to feel the caffeine kick in. “Promise you won’t yell at me. There’s something I need to tell you.”

“It’s that briefcase, isn’t it? ” Janet’s eyes narrowed.

Two hours later Cody dialed the Personnel Manager at her ex-employer’s and booked an appointment.

“Did you tell her? ” Janet asked.

“Not over the phone. I don’t want to get there and find a paddy wagon waiting.”

Janet laughed. “I’m sure the boys in blue have better things to do, like maybe catching muggers and rapists.”

Cody grinned at her. “Let’s do lunch.”

“Can you afford it? ”

“I have exactly two hundred, forty-two dollars and sixty cents to my name.”

She and Janet surveyed the neatly stacked banknotes lined up along the kitchen table. Both women sighed audibly.

“Ninety thousand dollars, ” Janet said. “It doesn’t look like that much, does it? ”

“Just a lot of paper, ” Cody said quietly.

Annabel paced her verandah restlessly, a glass of scotch in one hand and a cigarette in the other. She hadn’t smoked in years and had coughed and spluttered for the first few drags. She’d found a half-full box in one of her Aunt’s cupboards and figured they must have been left by a guest; one of Annie’s lovers, perhaps. In recent years Annie had a few, Annabel recalled. Perhaps she felt Rebecca would not have wanted her to be alone all this time.

Annabel wondered if any of them had stayed on the island and decided it was unlikely. Annie would not have brought another woman into the home she had shared with the love of her life. How did that feel? she mused. To find the love of your life. Was there only one? Did you just know when she came along that there would be no other like her? Ever. Or was it all just a myth? Could you spend your entire life looking for her, only to find somehow you missed one another—that something went wrong in the universe the day you were destined to meet? A plane was delayed or it rained and she caught a taxi instead of walking through the park where your paths should have crossed. Was it the luck of the draw, and nothing more?

It was three days since Cody had gone, and Annabel had given up wondering what else her note had said. She had interrogated the staff at the Rarotongan and lied through her teeth to Air New Zealand officials. All she had managed to elicit was that Cody Stanton had left for Auckland, New Zealand. She had given no forwarding instructions for her mail and had paid cash for her hotel room.

Annabel had contemplated going to the police but, thinking of the poster, she held back. If Cody was in any kind of trouble the last thing she wanted to do was make things worse for her.

As it happened she had little choice in the matter, for the police, finally discovering Cody had been on Moon Island, contacted her. After offering condolences on the death of her Aunt—the donor of a sea rescue craft to the local station—the young sergeant was remarkably forthcoming. He even phoned his Wellington counterparts for more information.

“A relative, Miss Margaret Redmond, wishes to contact Miss Stanton, ” he explained to Annabel. “She believes Miss Stanton may be depressed, possibly suicidal. A family dispute it seems.”

Annabel kept her face impassive. “Really? Margaret Redmond? ” What was Cody’s ex doing going to the police with a story like that?

“Miss Redmond said something about arranging a reconciliation, ” the officer said.

Annabel felt the blood drain from her face. A reconciliation? That explained everything.

“Well, there’s nothing more for us to do now that Miss Stanton has returned home, ” he said, obviously pleased to have ‘solved’ the case. “I’ll notify Wellington. Thanks for your help, Ms. Worth.”

“My pleasure, ” Annabel said, her voice laced with irony.

The days that followed were a nightmare. Trying to force Cody out of her mind, Annabel had gone over her Aunt’s diaries again, scouring for more clues about what had happened after Rebecca died. In her mind she constructed version after version of the truth.

Annie had gotten a job in Boston and Lucy had died tragically of some obscure illness. Annie and Lucy had gone to live with relatives in Europe and Lucy had been killed in a drowning accident. Lucy’s fever turned out to be meningitis and she had died soon after Annie reached Boston.

If only Cody had stayed, Annabel thought distractedly as she stubbed out her cigarette. More than anything, she longed to discuss the whole mysterious business with someone else, gain another woman’s perspective. There was something blindingly obvious she was just not seeing. And somewhere in the back of her memory a faint chord registered, a phrase ran through her head over and over: She need never know.

Who had said that? Her brows knitted as fragments shifted in and out of focus. The letter Jessup had asked her about—addressed to “Lucy”; the uncanny sense of dé jà vu that had beset her ever since she set foot on the island; the missing diaries; the family silence around Annie’s life and that of her child; the inheritance.

Annabel churned it over and over, poured another scotch, lit another cigarette. She was becoming obsessed. Pull yourself together, she ordered sternly. She had to stop thinking about it, creating a soap opera out of her life. Abruptly she froze, choking on a mouthful of scotch. It hit her with such blinding clarity she almost fainted.

“No, ” she whispered. It wasn’t possible. It simply couldn’t be.

But every cell in her body knew.