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From “Alice In Wonderland” by Lewice Caroll






" I proceed.”- said the mouse - " Edwin..nd Morcar, me earls of Mercia and Northumbria, declared for him; and even Stigand, the patriotic archbishop of Canterbury, found it advisable…'"

" Found what? " said the Duck.

" Found it, " the Mouse replied rather ci" ^'- " of course you know what it' means.1'

" I know what it' means well enough, when / find a thing, " said the Duck: " it's generally a frog, or a worm. The question is, what did the archbishop find? "

The Mouse did not notice this question, but hur­riedly went on, " '—found it advisable to go with Edgar Atheling to meet William and offer him the crown. William's conduct at first was moderate. But the insolence of his Normans —' How are you get­ting on now, my dear? " it continued, turning to Alice as it spoke.

" As wet as ever, " said Alice in a melancholy tone: " it doesn't seem to dry me at all."

" In that case, " said the Dodo solemnly, rising to its feet, " I move that the meeting adjourn, for the immediate adoption of more energetic remedies—"

" Speak English! " said the Eaglet. " I don't know the meaning of half those long words, and, what's more, I don't believe you do either! " And the Eaglet bent down its head to hide a smile: some of the other birds tittered audibly.

" What I was going to say, " said the Dodo in an offended tone, " was, that the best thing to get us dry would be a Caucus-race."

" What is a Caucus-race? " said Alice; not that she much wanted to know, but the Dodo had paused as if it thought that somebody ought to object. No one else seemed inclined to say anything.

" Why, " said the Dodo, " the best way to explain it is to do it." (And, as you might like to try the thing yourself some winter-day, I will tell you how the Dodo managed it.)

First it marked out a race-course, in a sort of cir­cle, (" the exact shape doesn't matter, " it said,) and then all the party were placed along the course, here and there. There was no " One, two, three, and away! " but they began running when they liked, and left off when they liked, so that it was not easy to know when the race was over. However, when they had been running half an hour or so, and were quite dry again, the Dodo suddenly called out " The race is over! " and they all crowded round it, pant­ing, and asking " But who has won? "

This question the Dodo could not answer without a great deal of thought, and it stood for a long time with one finger pressed upon its forehead (the posi­tion in which you usually see Shakespeare, in the pictures of him), while the rest waited in silence. At last the Dodo said, " Everybody has won, and all must have prizes."

" But who is to give the prizes? " quite a chorus of voices asked.

" Why, she, of course, " said the Dodo, pointing to Alice with one finger; and the whole party at once crowded round her, calling out, in a confused way, " Prizes! Prizes! "

Alice had no idea what to do, and in despair she put her hand in her pocket, and pulled out a box of comfits (luckily the salt-water had not got into it), and handed them round as prizes. There was exactly one a-piece, all round.

 

" Make practical stylistic tasks

Consider the following sentences and comment on the function of morphological grammatical categories and parts of speech that create stylistic function:

1 One night I am standing in front of Mindy's restaurant on Broadway, thinking of practically nothing whatever, when all of a sudden I feel a very terrible pain in my left foot. (Runyon)2 It's good, that, to see you again, Mr. Philip, said Jim. (Caldwell)3 Earth colours are his theme. When he shows up at the door, we see that he's even dressing in them. His pants are grey. His shirt is the same colour as his skin. Flesh colour. 4(Erdrich) Now, the Andorrans were a brave, warlike people centuries ago, as everybody was at one time or another—for example, take your Assyr­ians, who are now extinct; or your Swedes, who fought in the Thirty Years' War but haven't done much since except lie in the sun and turn brown... (Berger) 5A gaunt and Halloweenish grin was plastered to her face. (Erdrich) I walked past Mrs. Shumway, who jerked her head around in a startled woodpeckerish way... (Erdrich) 6 She's the Honourable Mrs. Beste-Chetwynde, you know—sister-in-law of Lord Postmaster—a very wealthy woman, South American. (Waugh) 7...there are two kinds of people, which we may call the hurters and the hurtees. The first get their satisfaction by working their will on somebody else. The second like to be imposed upon. (Burger)8 To hear her was to be beginning to despair. (Jarrell) 9But they do manage the building? Mrs. Doubleday said to him. (Cheever) 10A band indeed! You' II be having fireworks next. (Wausb) 11 I stare down at the bright orange capsules... I have to listen... so we look at each other, up and down, and up and down... Without us, they say, without Loise, it's the state hospital. (Erdrich) 12 Ah! That must be Aunt Augusta. Only relatives, or creditors, ever ring in that Wagnerian manner. (Wilde) 13 I got nothing against Joe Chapin, but he's not me. I'm me, and another man is still another man. (O'Hara) 14 That's not the Mr. Littlejohn I used to know. (Waugh) 15 I pronounce that the sentence on the defendants, Noelle Page and Lawrence Douglas, shall be execution by a firing squad. (Sheldon) 16 They are all being so formal. Let's play a game to break the ice. (Bell) 17 I wondered how the Moroccan boy... could stand meekly aside and watch her go off with another man. Actors, I thought. They must divide themselves into compartments. (Shaw) 18 Oh, I guess I love you, I do love the children, but I love myself, I love my life, it has some value and some promise for me... (Cheever) 19 Let him say his piece, the darling. Isn't he divine? (Waugh) 20 It never was the individual sounds of a language, but the melodies behind them, that Dr. Rosenbaum imitated. For these his ear was Mozartian. (Jarrell) 21 They are allowed to have the train stopped at every cross-roads... (Atkin­son)

 

 


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