Студопедия

Главная страница Случайная страница

КАТЕГОРИИ:

АвтомобилиАстрономияБиологияГеографияДом и садДругие языкиДругоеИнформатикаИсторияКультураЛитератураЛогикаМатематикаМедицинаМеталлургияМеханикаОбразованиеОхрана трудаПедагогикаПолитикаПравоПсихологияРелигияРиторикаСоциологияСпортСтроительствоТехнологияТуризмФизикаФилософияФинансыХимияЧерчениеЭкологияЭкономикаЭлектроника






CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR. Jill held up the sack when she walked into the cabin






Jill held up the sack when she walked into the cabin. " I picked up burgers. You feel like eating out in the garden? "

Carrie shook her head, her eyes moving around the room quickly, then settling back on Jill.

" Please don't say you're not hungry, " Jill said as she walked closer. " Getting you to eat something lately has become a full-time job." She set the bag on the bar then wrapped her arms around Carrie, smiling when she heard her sigh.

" I love you, Jill."

Her brief kiss became lingering, and Jill closed her eyes, falling into Carrie's embrace, but Carrie stopped, pulling away.

" We need to talk, Jill, " she said quietly.

Five simple words, yet Jill felt her world crumbling. Their eyes fixed on each other, holding, searching. Jill's breath left her and she shook her head.

" No, " she whispered.

" Yes." Carrie took her hand and led her into the sunroom. " Let's sit."

Jill shook her head. " No. I don't want to sit."

Carrie sighed wearily. " Please? I need you to do this for me."

" Oh, God, " she whispered. " You're sick, aren't you? "

Carrie nodded. " Yes." She patted the seat beside her. " Come."

Jill took a deep breath then sat down, her eyes searching Carrie's. " How bad? "

Carrie took her hand and brought it to her lips. " Bad. It's bad, Jill."

" Oh, God. Your headaches? "

Carrie nodded. " They found... they found tumors, Jill."

Jill stared, unable to breathe, unable to look away. " No." She shook her head. " No."

" I've been thinking. You know, it's not too late. You can stay with Craig, you can try to salvage your marriage."

" No! No, no, no, " she said loudly. " I don't want him! I don't want my marriage! I just want you."

Carrie looked away. " I'm sorry."

" Oh, God, Carrie. I'm sorry, " she said around her tears. " I'm sorry." She drew Carrie to her, her lips moving without thought before burying her face against Carrie.

" I love you so much, " Carrie whispered. " I'm sorry."

" No." Jill cleared her throat then pulled away. " We'll get through this." She took a deep breath and wiped at her tears. " So... what do they say? The doctors... what do we do? "

Carrie shook her head. " You don't understand. There's nothing to do."

Jill's eyes widened. " What do you mean? No treatment? "

" No. They're inoperable, Jill."

Her words sunk in and Jill slowly shook her head. " No, " she whispered. " No. I won't let you give up."

Carrie took her hand again, holding it tight. " I'm not giving up. There's nothing to give up, Jill. There is no chance."

" There are treatments. There are always treatments."

" No. No, I won't go through that. And for what? To prolong this for another month at the most? No. I don't want my last days on this earth to be in a hospital, hooked to machines, stuck with needles... sick as a dog. No! I won't do it."

Jill stood, moving away from her, her eyes wide. " I call that giving up."

Carrie closed her eyes, shaking her head. " No, darling. It's just accepting reality, that's all." She stood, slowly walked across the room to Jill. She took her hands again. " There's not much time left, " she said softly. " I know it. I can feel it. Don't make me go through chemo." She shook her head again, finally giving in to the tears Jill knew she had been hiding. " Don't make me do that for you."

Jill broke down then, her sobs shaking her whole body, and she clung to Carrie, taking comfort, trying to give comfort.

" No, baby, no. Don't cry, " Carrie murmured. " This won't help anything. Don't cry, " she said again. " Your tears are too valuable to lose."

" Don't leave me."

" It's not up to me."

" But—"

" No. No, " she whispered, her lips lightly brushing Jill's mouth. " Please stop crying. Please? I can't bear to see you like this."

" I'm sorry, " Jill said, her tears still falling.

" We don't have much time, Jill. Not much time at all."

" Oh, God." Jill wiped at her eyes, trying to get herself under control and failing. " I'm sorry."

" No. I'm sorry." She tried to smile. " I don't suppose there's ever a good time or place to tell someone news like this." She took a deep breath. " I'll have to tell them tonight."

Them meant her family and the reality of their situation—of their relationship—hit home. This was what they had. One hour each day. Even now, during this time of sorrow and angst, that's all they would have. One hour. Her tears fell anew.

" I know, darling. I know, " Carrie murmured. " As much as I want to spend my last hours with you, we both know I can't. I'll be with my kids instead. But know my thoughts will be of you. My last thoughts will be of you."

" No, no, no, " Jill whispered.

" Please don't be sad. Look at me, Jill." Jill raised her face, ignoring the tears that flowed freely down her cheeks. " Our souls, they're connected. We'll be together again. Just like before. Just like now, in this life. There'll be others."

" I so want to believe you."

Carrie wiped at Jill's tears then brought their mouths together.

" Then believe."

 


Поделиться с друзьями:

mylektsii.su - Мои Лекции - 2015-2024 год. (0.009 сек.)Все материалы представленные на сайте исключительно с целью ознакомления читателями и не преследуют коммерческих целей или нарушение авторских прав Пожаловаться на материал